Today is the 15th anniversary of my first wedding. I was young, in love, and looking forward to the future. If I had known what that marriage would bring me I would have run and run far. Instead I was over the moon in love. Looking back it is so easy to see all the little signs that maybe something was off, not quite right. Hindsight is definitely 20/20! I don't regret that marriage. I want to be able to say that I do, but I really don't regret it. I would like to believe that I came out of it stronger. That I am a better, more understanding and compassionate person.
Abuse is something nobody should have to go through. It's something I wouldn't wish on my worst enemy. The abuse is something that is with me to this day. For the most part I have recovered from it, it took years and lots of loving care. I don't know if those scars will ever completely heal. Random things can cause the scabs to peel back, but they are never completely ripped off.
Fifteen years ago I was in love with a kind, caring, loving, handsome man who I was marrying. He didn't end up being who he'd portrayed himself to be, but at that time he was amazing.
